Breaking the Rules
I have a policy about relationships that I stand by at all times. This is probably the only set-in-stone policy I have, and I have never once broken it. My policy is this: If you are dating someone, and you break up, under NO CIRCUMSTANCES can you EVER get back with that person. I realize that many of you are probably deeply opposed to this because “love has bumpy roads” or what ever, but I believe that if you are meant to be with someone, then a fight isn’t going to break you up, and if it does, you shouldn’t get back together later because what ever it was that broke you up in the first place is still there in that person.
Insanity: attempting the same experiment multiple times expecting a new outcome.
Now, this IS my solid rule, and I WILL not break this one, but with this rule usually comes the complete expulsion from my thoughts that I spoke about yesterday. What ever it was as friends that got me interested in them in the first place, will probably still be there after we break up, therefore, if I remain associated with that person after the relationship is over, I could end up contemplating whether or not I should break my rule.
My dilemma is that, I HAVE stood by my rule, and I HAVEN’T been associated with this person after the break up, but for some reason, every time I see their name in my contact list, or on Facebook, I get the over whelming urge to speak to them again. I don’t know why this feeling is so strong, because it has never been an issue with any past breakups. We’ve been apart for a while, (We actually never became official because she didn’t want to commit to an official relationship) and it hasn’t been difficult to not think about her up until now.
Maybe it’s because at this point in time, I am feeling really depressed every day for one reason or another, and it would help to talk to someone who really understands me. When we talked, even before we confessed to being extremely into each other, I just felt like she was so relateable. She knew exactly what I was thinking, and half the time we just spent going back and forth agreeing with every word of each other’s sentences. Conversations with her were amazing.
The issue is that if I do start talking to her again, what if I start liking her again? Then I would be trying to break my rule, and that would be terrible. Also, there are multiple reasons why I don’t talk to her, besides just the fact that we used to be some-what of an item. She’s way to critical with everyone, and when we were “together” I was always trying to calm her down about some issue she had with someone. My friends were always telling me about how mean she was to them because they said some joke that was kinda vulgar, and she flipped out about it. Plus her fashion sense was extremely off kilter. I’m not sure what it was that made me still like her after all of that stuff that was going on, and I don’t know why I have such an urge to be friends with her again despite all of our differences. I guess I just don’t see the differences when we’re talking, but they must still be there.
A bunch of my friends are going through breakups right now. I hate seeing them so sad, about this. Why must the dudes they go out with always be some friggin screwed up? Why can’t they tell that they aren’t going to be good for them in advance? Frig I hate people so much! I just wish people would stop and think about somebody besides themselves for once, because frankly, none of us are worth caring about ourselves. We need to realize that we are all scum together, and that other people are way more important. Don’t hurt people just because you can.
Time To See How it Went
Well, I’m getting ready to go back to school. After breaking up with my gf, and her seeming to not care at all, I’m pretty actious to see how things will go today. Knowing her, and how quickly we got together, I wouldn’t be surprised If she had a new boyfriend already who she’s ready to rub in my face the second I walk through the door today. But, I’m not really caring too much. I’m glad to be finished with a relationship that wasn’t going anywhere, and I hope she is happy with whatever happens in her life to come.
It sucks when you break up with someone, and it seems as though they don’t care at all. It’s good that I didnt have to see her looking upset or anything, but she didnt seem to care what so ever. She was probably tired of me anyway, I just happened to do it before she could.
I guess it’s for the best, but I can’t help but think she’s going to have a new boyfriend really soon that’s going to do all he can to rub it in my face. I just hate hurting people so much, and I braced myself all day for this, and she doesn’t even flinch.
Why am I more upset than she is, when I broke up with her?
It’s always difficult to break up with someone, but it’s necessary if you aren’t happy anymore. I’m just going to hate seeing her face when I break it to her. The sad look of disappointment is the worst part. I wish I didn’t have to do it, but i must. :(